Return to Me

When I returned from Haiti 6 weeks ago, my heart was broken. I found myself writing in my journal alot...

"God, I am hurting. I am hurting because the people there are hurting, and I'm not. Because they are in desperate need, and I'm not. Because I want to be there with the boys. Because I miss them. I miss knowing that I am making a difference in the lives of people who are truly in desperate need. As heart-wrenching as it is to look at pictures from the trip and cry tears at the sight of each precious face not knowing if I'll ever hold them again, it is more heart-wrenching to think of a day when I can't remember anymore. So I replay those memories in my mind many times over longing to be playing in the dirt with those adorable children in Guibert. I long to work side-by-side with people who are eager to rebuild their country and their lives. I long to hold each beautiful Haitian child and love them like they are my own. I long to live simply and joyfully in community with no concept of time or stress. I long for the Haitian family I have made and love. Yet I know God has brought me back with a passion & love for a reason. God, I long to be content where you have placed me. I need Your heart, Your eyes, and Your Spirit to consume me and rid me of all my own desires. And if it be in Your will, I will return back to the Haitian people I love so dearly."

Well, in His will God has given me the chance to return to Haiti. My team leaves in the morning, and we land in Haiti at 3:45pm. The people of Guibert have been heavy on my heart and my mind. I have been in constant prayer as I pray that God prepares me to do His work and His will. I am eager to see the faces of the children that I fell in love with. I am eager to hold them in my arms. I am eager to build new relationships with the Haitians I will be working with and the families whose homes we will be building. I am eager to return to the country that captured my heart. I am eager to see the continued work of God's hand in the lives of the people that I so hesitantly left.